Friday, February 25, 2011

Two And a Half Men Cancelled

Two and a Half Men was canceled because Charlie Sheen can't stop doing coke and banging hookers....i heard he was so distraught after the show was canceled he started doing coke and banging hookers...seriously you know your life is bad when Emilio Estevez pretends he's not your brother...
Friday, February 25, 2011

Willow Smith To Star In "Annie" Remake

Will Smith wants to remake Annie, starring his daughter...I can see it now, It's A Hard Knock Life Whipping My Hair Back and Forth...note to Will Smith: You're rich, stop trying to eat off your talentless kids...why don't you give some money to DJ Jazzy Jeff...he hasn't had a job since Uncle Phil threw him out the house
Friday, February 18, 2011

What Is Bullshit For $500

IBM decided to build a computer named "Watson" to play Jeopardy against human competition this week. "Surprisingly" the machine crushed the competition
A gigantic computer created by IBM specifically to excel at answers-and-questions left two champs of the TV game show in its silicon dust after a three-day tournament, a feat that experts call a technological breakthrough Watson earned $77,147, versus $24,000 for Ken Jennings and $21,600 for Brad Rutter. Jennings took it in stride writing "I for one welcome our new computer overlords" alongside his correct Final Jeopardy answer.Source
 Really a technological breakthrough?? I mean isn't that what computers are supposed to do, store information that's easily accessible?  A technological breakthrough to me is a computer that can give you head and make a me weird but when I boot up my computer it's never asked me to google something for it or ask me where the best place to watch porn is.
Monday, February 14, 2011

Christina Aguilera is Fat...

...Oh yeah and she fell on stage last night at the Grammys...she went from Genie in a Bottle to... wow shes so fat when she walks she waddles.  Bad enough you get fat, then you screw up the national anthem at the Super Bowl (thank god Fergie was there to make you look good), then your fat ass falls at the Grammys...I know who ate all the Lady Marmalade.
Monday, February 14, 2011

Esperanza Spalding Wins Best New Artist Award?

At the Grammy's last night Drake and Justin Bieber, who were up for best new artist award both looked stunned as the best new artist award went to Esperanza Spalding....I know I have no idea who she is either. I couldn't even find a picture so I put up one of a basketball. It's rumored that Bieber was so distraught from losing to a nobody that his testicles, which were rumored to drop some time this year, are in a indefinite hiatus....Later that evening Rihanna and Drake dedicated her big hit "What's My Name" to Spalding
Wednesday, February 09, 2011

Bieber Fever May Actually Be A.I.D.S

Justin Biebers 3D Movie "Never Say Never" comes out this week...or as the older single creepy guys who are gonna go see it call the 3D experience "Interactive Pedophilia"
Tuesday, February 08, 2011

Lady Gaga Want's New Perfume To Smell Like "Blood and Semen"

Lady Gaga is probably the only star I've ever seen who never...ever...ever wants attention for acting and dressing up like a weirdo *sarcasm it was no surprise when she announced her new perfume would have something controversial about it

According to, the shocking superstar is developing her first fragrance, and Mother Monster has reportedly requested that the scent "smell of blood and semen."Source
So basically the perfume will smell exactly like Lady Gaga...and I heard she will guarantee to rub one out in each bottle that ships out herself.
Sunday, February 06, 2011

The Greenbay Packers Beat The Pittsburgh Steelers For a Superbowl Win

The Packers came into Dallas on Sunday and treated Ben Roethlisberger like he was a girl in a bathroom stall that another Ben Roethlisberger would have entered and then...well you know where this goes.  MVP quarterback Aaron Rodgers helped lead the Packers to a 31-25 victory taking down the Steelers defense as well as ruining the mood on Brett Favre's annual Sunday Masturbating In Crocs and Wrangler Jeans word yet if this will be re-scheduled.